mixed emotions.

I took a bus homed. But I cannot stand it anymore and got off one stop earlier than my usual. Been contemplating to walk home today even at such a late hour. I don't know why I got off earlier, but it happened when a lady behind me said excuse me and I just tap out cause I'm too lazy to give way to her.

But is that really the reason?

Walking home, made me reflect about today and the things I did. Whenever I'm walking home, I start to think deep. And apparently, the more I think, the more upset I am today. the more I re-read the texts, the more furious and disappointed I get.

It was guilt, followed by an unknown pang of anger that quickly turned into disappointments and tears just came out suddenly, and well... I ended up reaching home with swollen eyes. I hate feeling that way. It's like the more I think about it, the more I feel that it wasn't my fault at all.

I hate it when people mistook my good intentions and turn it to a way that I made them angry, or gets too sensitive and touchy just because of the tone that I used was what they perceived it to be; uninterested/pissed/touchy/arrogant. Because honestly, It's not like I can do something about my voice right? It's natural.

I don't know what to do right now honestly. I just want to sleep everything off.

Being angry is not an excuse to vent your anger on others. Being angry at someone who pissed you off is justifiable.

And I'm really pissed off now.
I need more moolahs to buy stuffs and get my starbucks fix tmr.
Hopefully, God will give me a better day tomorrow.